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Let's Just Start this Day with a Bang in the Head

Weigh-In Wednesday: 150.2 lbs

So today started by getting my (rightfully but nonetheless) grumpy husband out the door for work. Next, it was weigh in time where I was greeted with a number in the 150's, again. Walked into work to see an email from a very rude coworker throwing me under the bus for her mistake. Followed by an inquiry from an upset coworker about an incident that was taken care of weeks ago. I explained everything twice and then stopped trying. The system is down and half of our server is acting up. Why I am here? Oh yeah, because I pay mortgage for a house I am not in, payments on a car I barely drive, and I have a crippling amount of student debt for a degree that have provided me with a higher position than I am currently working. If ever I needed comfort food, it was now.

Here is what I ate today:

Breakfast - pancakes
Snack - cherries
Lunch - turkey sandwich and popcorn
Snack - peanut butter crackers
Dinner - *cheat meal*

I am just wanting all the things I shouldn't have. Rich chocolate cake, honey shrimp from Panda Express, chocolate chip cookies, a chocolate Tootsie Roll Pop from my husband's office. I also want creamy mac 'n cheese, and an everything bagel pilled high with salmon cream cheese. The Scalloped Potatoes my mom used to make, soft serve swirl ice cream with rainbow sprinkles, a Kit Kat Bar... The list could go on, and on, and on, and on...

I will put you out of your misery here and tell you instead that I am not eating these delicious treats, nor am I enjoying myself or surrounds. My day has been a disaster of never ending meaningless work for ungrateful arses. I am skipping the gym tonight because I need to do something, even if just one small thing, for myself.

To help me feel a little better, my husband brought home a cheat meal for me. It is my first cheat in 6 weeks so I allowed myself to eat the honey shrimp from Panda Express that I had been craving all day. He also brought home a bottle of Red Rose wine. He is the sweetest even though I am going to be cursing him tomorrow when the stomach cramps start.

Over and Out,
The Girl with IBS

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